It’s just not fair
Fairness is a messed up concept. Think about it. Here is a concept, an ideal, that everything in life should be equal and that people get what they deserve. Cynicism aside, we all know that life is not fair. And yet, when something bad happens the first thing we want to cry out is “that’s not fair!!”. This is as true in life as it is at work. Even if we mentally understand and accept that life isn’t fair, it actually doesn’t make it easier to cope with.
But you know what helps, even if just a little? Acknowledgment.
So here you go:
You. Got. Screwed. And it sucks major ass. You worked your butt off for that company and still got laid off. You where blamed for a mistake at work you had nothing to do with. You warned people that something bad was going to happen but no one listened to you. Whatever. Either way, something happened and you got the short end of the stick. We have all been there, and we all understand how crappy it feels.
You know, just because something is irrational, like expecting the world to be fair,it doesn’t mean that the feelings of frustration and anxiety that go with it aren’t real. Sometimes you just need someone to acknowledge your feelings before you can let them go and move on. So consider yourself acknowledged, check out the Jonathan Coulton song Screwed, and move on.
June 7th, 2009 saat: 2:40 pm
Acknowledgment – especially from others goes a long way. I've had two bad, and I mean REALLY BAD, bosses in my career.
The first one was just plain mean, stupid, etc. But he treated everyone the same; so we were all in the same boat together. When others saw what was going on they would give you words of encouragement to let you know that it wasn't you. Although, I actually left the company because of his behaviour it was okay because I knew I was not the source of the problems.
The second boss was much worse, not in her behaviour, but in her selectiveness of that bad behaviour. Some people could do no wrong while others could do no right. Can you guess which employee I was?
This boss was, by her own admission, both bi-polar and a recovered bulimic; and many believed her to be anorexic. Because of the eating disorders she could not always stomach her bi-polar medication; So, one never knew if she took her "meds" that day or not and didn't know whether to expect Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde.
It wasn't until after I left that others let me know how badly they felt for me (but were too afraid to say anything – that's how vindictive she could be). That simple acknowledgement helped to keep me sane and get over it very quickly.
So, yes, acknowledgement, if not by others, then at least by yourself help you to move on.
June 8th, 2009 saat: 6:23 pm
Charles – Bad bosses are the worst!