… the HR Minion. Because even minions have opinions. And giggles.

Can I call you "sweetie"?

… or “How can I avoid sexually harassing my husband at work.”

So the good news is that I am gainfully employed again. Yay! I like money. The bad news is that it’s going to be impacting my, admittedly excessive, travel plans for this fall. Hard decisions and compromises will have to be made. Such is life and I’m not going to complain. Too hard.

I will be working for that other big retailer that happens to be headquartered up here (think about it) in a 3 month temporary role. It’s not in an HR role but I like to think of it as “HR adjacent”. Not ideal, but it’s a great way to get experience with the company and see what it’s like to work for them. Not to mention it’ll be helpful to have while looking for something permanent in HR. An unexpected bonus is that I will be working for the same company the husband does, though not on the same team thankfully.

Now, the HR pro in me is thinking about how I need to act professionally in this situation, but my evil side totally wants to mess with him (cue evil laughter). As we have never worked at the same company before, maintaining the appropriate boundaries has never come up. A part of me kind of wants to know what I could get away with. Obviously PDA’s of any kind are completely inappropriate, but can I call him “sweetie”? How about something cutesy like “snuggle bunny”? Can I deliver a handmade lunch with a loving note covered in hearts? Put up cute, but embarrassing, photos of him in my cube? See, these are the evil thoughts that run through my head and yes, please feel free to pity my husband. I’m sure he feels thoroughly embarrassed right… about… now!

I hope you all realize that I am totally kidding, I would never do anything to embarrass him in front of his co-workers. Nor do I have any desire to be fired for sexual harassment. But it’s fun to tease. And yes, I don’t know how he puts up with me either.

13 Responses | Add your Own

  • 1 Insightful Endeavors International, Inc :

    Congrats on the gig — and thanks, sweetie, for the delightfully entertaining post. 😉

  • 2 adowling :

    Call him poopsie and cutie pie and leave him cute little notes on his desk while he's away. Oh, and put those cute pictures of you guys on his desk too 🙂

    Congrats on the new job!

  • 3 Kerry :

    Rock on. If it's the retailer I'm thinking of, rock on again, because I like that one a lot.

  • 4 George Guajardo :

    We prefer "pookie" in work settings. Also, in front of his co-workers, make sure to remind him to use the air freshener after he uses the can. It's there for a reason, right?

  • 5 roolvoel :

    Congrats Shauna!

  • 6 HR Minion :

    Insightful – Thanks!

    April – I like the little notes idea, I think I might actually do that!

    Kerry – It probably is and I like them too. 🙂

    George -That is so mean! I could never do that!

    Roolvoel – Thanks!

  • 7 Lance :

    Nice! Experiencing things outside of HR is always good 🙂

  • 8 Laurie :

    First off: hooray.

    Second of all: double hooray. I met Ken at work and I loved to sexually harass him. It was awesome. I'm like, "What are you gonna do? Report me to HR."

    It was fun. Enjoy it. Most couples never have a chance to fool around (in a very innocent way) during the day. You can have dates at the vending machine. It's very romantic, actually. You can say, "Sir, you look very handsome, today. Does your wife know you look so hot at work?"

    Oh man, I miss working with Ken.

  • 9 HR Minion :

    Lance – I agree! 🙂

    Laurie – I could not stop laughing at your comment! Could you have written yourself up for the harassment? Tim and I totally need to have a date at the vending machine now, that's just too adorable.

  • 10 Charles :

    Congrats!

    Unlike the other comments here, I would totally mess with his and, especially, his coworker's heads by flirting with everyone else but ignore him. (this would only work if everyone knows that you two are married)

    Just kidding. Just kidding.

  • 11 HR Minion :

    Charles – Oh, that's mean! 😉

  • 12 Rachel - I Hate HR :

    Congratulations!

    What an interesting concept. "What's for dinner?" – the new face of sexual harassment.

  • 13 HR Minion :

    Rachel – You mean I can't tease him about not making bacon for dinner now? 🙂